Cambodia, Day 0 – Holiday foreplay
And they’re off and racing!! Two Clowns tripping across the globe, one uncoordinated foot after the other!
It still doesn’t feel like a real holiday though, more like holiday foreplay (you know, that 3 minutes before the real show starts?). Yes, we’re in a different city; but no, it’s still Australia, Melbourne this time!
We got in around 11:30am, which we thought would give us plenty of time to make our transfers to the hotel and then get us into the CBD for a bite to eat for lunch.
But of course, Murphy being his typical gregarious self, after a few unexpected delays we only ended up getting into town at around 2:45pm.
Now if this was still Hobart I wouldn’t have even bothered trying to find anywhere decent to eat on a Sunday afternoon. “Abandon all hope, ye who enter here!”
But this was Melbourne, city of plenty in the land of milk and honey; cosmopolitan capital of Australia! Alas, to no avail. While there were numerous cafes and noodle bars open, we struggled to find anywhere decent to grab a quick, but decent, feed. Everything seemed to shut at 3pm and then reopen later in the evening.
We had originally planned on visiting Heirloom for lunch. Japanese delicacies + whisky tastings would have been the perfect combination! Instead, we ended up on the other side of town on Hardware Lane in a fast food joint called Big Boy BBQ, tucking into a pulled pork bun for myself, and a slow cooked lamb bun for Karen.
Both the pork and the lamb had been cooked well, with the spicy sauce adding a good level of heat. Unfortunately the meal couldn’t escape a distinct ‘fast food’ feel (yes, I do realise it IS actually fast food…but with a little extra TLC it’s still possible to take this sort of food to the next level!). While it filled the holes in our bellies, it wasn’t what we had our hopes set on!
(Crumb Street Kitchen absolutely annihilates Big Boy on both taste, texture and quality as well by the way…so kudos to Hobart for at least getting that right!)
With a few hours up our sleeve we decided to grab a movie over at the Kino cinema on Collins Street. It’s always nice when you can take in a glass of red and a choc top for your viewing pleasure!
We ended up seeing “This is the End” written by, and starring, a handful of America’s ‘leading’ funny guys (Seth Rogan, Jonah Hill, Craig Robinson et al…), + Hermione from Harry Potter. I can just imagine these guys hanging out one rainy weekend having a few beers and the odd joint or three, fiercely competing to come up with the most harebrained and ridiculous movie plots possible, and then just looking at each other saying, “Why not? We’ve got the cash, we’ve got the reputations, we don’t care about our reputations…”.
I imagine the plot discussion would have gone something like…
“We can throw a huge party, and then invite all our famous friends around, and its the best party ever because we’re there, and then Michael Cera can snort some coke, and James Franco can stroke his hipster goatee a few times, and then Michael Cera can snort some more coke (you know you want to Michael), and then let’s have some aliens appear with blue beams of light and everyone gets teleported (except for us, because we’re awesome and the stars of the show), and then the ground can open up in a massive earthquake unveiling the burning pits of hell, and then Michael Cera can get sucked off (you know you want to Michael), and then Satan himself appears on the doorstep, and then we almost die of starvation and dehydration waiting out the end of days, and then our buddy gets possessed by a demon, and then…”
Seriously, if it was anyone else this movie would never have seen the light of day! I did laugh though, numerous times, at the most inappropriate and childish humour imaginable. The perfect Sunday afternoon time waster!
Next up, dinner at Gangnam Pocha! Yeah sure, they’re cashing in on yesterday’s hero, but the food was sensational! I had bulgogi beef that was absolutely divine! While for Karen it was an epic bubbling cauldron full of hearty chicken soup. A bizarre (and rather strong!) drinks mix to accompany the meal and we were two very happy little clowns (especially Karen who hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol in about three months!).
On wonky legs we took the Skybus back to the airport, another shuttle to our hotel, and that was it for us. Only 8 hours until the real holiday starts!
ps. Why have I got a note in my PDA from that evening reminding me of “Karaoke microphones and intercom”?? Obviously something struck me as quite amusing somewhere between Gangnam Pocha and stepping onto the Skybus, but for the life of me I can’t remember what it was!! I blame the Soju + Maehwasoo drinks mix!!